O the dichotomy of a crisis. Everyone sees it as difficult yet, some see it as true rationale to stumble while others see it as an opportunity to shine.
Times like Covid uncover the best and the worst in entrepreneurs and their teams. I speak to about 60-70 leaders per week, many of their staff, and meet with dozens throughout my own companies. During more extreme challenges, there basically are just two responses that illustrate the concept that crisis means, “Dangerous opportunity.”
RESPONSE 1: We’re going to really be hurt again by more Covid shut downs.
RESPONSE 2: We’re going to look for areas to improve so that we still hit our goals during Covid and act on several opportunities or needs that this crisis has created.
In my psych studies on the topic of “Resiliency” I discovered that 1/3rd of all children who come from abusive, alcoholic, hungry, impoverished, drug-ridden, broken, and/or dysfunctional homes go on to be super successful and in many cases the most influential people in history? These same statistics apply to adults who have been through significant trauma. In a study of prisoners of war; two-thirds of the former prisoners met the criteria for post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), while about one-third of the prisoners did not and went on to live normal or exemplary lives.
This is not to take away from the real pain anyone has suffered and expect more, but to give hope that despite fierce opposition, it is possible to rise and thrive. Like with the current crisis, you can decide that as a result of the pain, trauma, and loss that you are undone or that you will succeed anyway or even despite the problem.
The 100 Millionaires I work with, as an example and in establishing my own wealth over the decades, comes with a fail-learn, fail-grow, fail-get better, fail-pivot, fail-get help, fail-move. I always say, muscles need resistance to grow. But, it only works if you don’t stop or back down. It’s an up and down, rocky, lunar journey at best. At worst, you’ll take on deadly fire, get stabbed in the back, betrayed, and/or confront what appears to be insurmountable odds.
Social scientists have shown that the pain and risk are real and for certain groups create consistent issues like PTSD, alcoholism, addiction, depression, and chronic failure to thrive. On the other hand, they also have found a surprising pattern among those whose lives included incredibly tough times, but succeeded.
The good news is that we all possess the same internal stress fighting mechanisms. The difference is how we use them. The overcomer-achiever who has endured the worst of times, yet carried on has several things in common. Here are 4.
1. PERSPECTIVE:
A different, more constructive analysis. As an example, 2 siblings can endure the same broken home or abusive parents, yet have entirely different life outcomes. The problems were real, the difference is perspective. Was it perceived as preparation, a challenge, and connected to a Divine purpose or as unrecoverable odds against any chance of making it?
2. FIGHTER:
The resilient believe they are fighters. Many studies show it is the people that view their condition as something they can conquer and see themselves as fighters that are the resilient ones.
3. YOUR TEAM:
Having a constructive and encouraging best friend, coaches, mentors, and a positive social group comes up over and over again in the research as making all of the difference. Some will tell you that you’ll never amount to anything, but an encouraging word from a friend or even a stranger can let you know you’re special, important, you matter, and you can do it. Who has your back?
4. YOUR PLAN:
In cognitive psychology, recovery is never an environment. Those who believe circumstance determines outcome are ill-informed or ignorant to the fact that strategy: capabilities, belief, values, skills, execution, and identity trump difficult surroundings.
No one wants crisis, pain, or failure. Yet, ambiguity, change, and chaos are no longer the exception they are the norm – and have been that way for a very long time. We plan to hit or exceed every goal we had when the year started, have launched dozens of new businesses and taken charge of multiple opportunities in Covid, despite Covid, and because of Covid.
I’m here to help you thrive at any time, in any environment, despite your past, and on behalf of your future.
Live well!
Dr. Ben
